All is Well

In my last blog, posted in January of this year, I spoke of my business being in a state of flux. At the time, the only thing that was clear to me was that things were changing. As the year progressed, I realized that my Gyrotonic business was, well, it was gone, Not a murmur of life. Flat lined. Moreover, it had been heading that way for quite some time. So, I wasn’t surprised by my predicament, but I did wonder what I would be doing, if anything, with my business.

The days stretched out ahead of me like driving through Kansas on I-70, mile after mile of absolutely nothing. Nothing to do, nowhere to be, endless hours of wondering what would become of me and of my life. I knew I had to get friendly with that idea or I would be completely miserable. How was I to make peace with not being of service, not being in my business, not doing much of anything? Chop wood, carry water, raise a puppy. I needed to get really simple, stop efforting, relax into the moment and be in this very stopped place. Chop wood, carry water, raise a puppy. That was it. Simple. Tough on my ego. Good for my soul.

Mondays, for whatever reason, were particularly difficult and many Mondays came and went. As the latest Monday stretched out before me, I was bewildered and fed up with being so simple. I pulled out my card table, my foam board, images and glue and I began feverishly creating a collage. As I searched the internet, printed, cut and pasted; an intention unraveled in my brain and in my body. This collage was a love letter to life. It was me pouring out my love for WHAT IS in the midst of feeling so utterly WHAT ISN’T.

My heart blew open.

Within a few days, a friend and colleague who was starting the monthly meetings for her year-long business strategy series suggested that I join one of the groups. I raised an eyebrow (a trait I inherited from my mother) and asked, “What business, exactly, would I strategize about?” Since counseling – no matter what else is happening with the other dimensions of my business – has been my unwavering and faithful companion, she suggested that I strategize about that. OK, what else did I have to do? I was in.

At the first meeting I attended, a woman spoke of grappling with some issues with her leadership team. Having facilitated teams in the past, I knew that I could help and suggested that we meet for coffee to discuss the possibilities. She took me up on my offer. I began to work with her and her leadership team which began making huge strides toward being cohesive, dynamic, effective, and successful.

And I was having a blast!

Here it is! The next iteration of my passion for supporting people to be awake, alive, and engaged. Now I get to do just that in the business world; a world so in need of a new way of being, doing, relating, and succeeding.

So if you’ve been wondering why you haven’t heard from me since January . . .

It took a while to really let go of Gyrotonic as a business. I never lost my passion for the work, but I definitely lost my passion for running the business. So, it’s been a mighty process of releasing the grip on what was without striving, wanting, yearning, affirming – or pouting (much).

I have grieved the loss of that business.

The present moment is more real for me. Right here. Right now. Just this.

I opened up to life a bit more, both in what it is and what it isn’t.

I continue to be grateful for my counseling practice; my unwavering and faithful companion. When all else is in a state of flux, I always have counseling clients.

I’ve become more curious than concerned about what, if anything, is ahead.

The greatest teacher and guide for me was and is faith. Not faith that something new would show up or faith that I’d have a business to run, or faith that I would be doing anything but chop wood carry water . . . Faith that all is well. No matter what, all is well.

Ahh, it feels good to be writing again. I’ll be back soon!

To life, Carol